Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Good Bye Clown Car

First, let me apologize for taking so long between posts. The Johnsons have been a very busy family! Besides the usual struggle to get all 4 of us dressed and functioning in society, we have had some exciting visitors. But one of the biggest highlights of the last month is buying our new car!

I, of course, recognized the need for a new car somewhere in my third trimester, when my pregnancy hormones caused rage at even the most modest of inconveniences. Every time I had to get my huge self into the car and ride with my knees on the dashboard I became irate.

Russ and I didn't exactly see eye-to-eye on this issue. He felt that since the car was running fine, we had no need for a new one. But as soon as Adam was born, and all 4 of us were forced into such close quarters, it became clear to all involved that we were, in fact, driving a clown car.

After a solid month of my subtle suggestions (read: my singing circus music at the sight of our car, or asking where the jugglers would fit in the back seat) Russ finally got sick of me and agreed to look at some new cars. VICTORY!

Now here's where things get interesting. The play-by-play of our big shopping day:

10 am: After two hours of coordinating, feeding, dressing, and general mayhem, all the Johnson's were finally on our way to the dealership. However, when we got there, we learned we were an hour early. Of course, timing is the secret to successful outings with a newborn. We were distressed, but not lost! A quick stop at the grocery store would occupy Josie and give me time to feed Adam.

11 am: We're finally back at the dealership and looking at cars! Too bad its raining as we're trying to check out what's on the lot. I'm covering Adam with a blanket as he starts crying. Josie has dropped her stuffed animal in a puddle and is distraught.

11:30: We see one we like, time for a test drive! We move both car seats from one car to the new one and take it for a spin. The salesmen is quite a trooper continues to casually talk cargo space over the sound of Adam screaming and Josie interrupting.
12:00: We are in love. The Mazda 5 is the car for us! However, this one is used with lots of miles. Much discussion must take place in this guy's office. But Josie has had her fill of car dealerships and has taken to running and screaming all over the showroom.

12:05: Johnson Clown Car is taken in for trade-in appraisal. Mortification hits us as we realize the car was not only filthy, but actually filled with helium balloons--- a gift to the kids from the grocery store! Clown car indeed!

12:30: We escape the salesman to go home and "discuss." We have been gone a full hour and a half longer than we'd planned to and both Josie and Adam are starving and coming unglued. We hit the nearest Subway, then head home for naptime.

2:00: Russ and I have decided we love the Mazda 5. Its a cool cross-over on the outside, and like a mini-mini-van on the inside. I love it! Russ decides to casually browse the Mazda dealership near our house and see if a new one would offer a better deal. He plans to be home in an hour.

4:00: Russ is still not home. Interesting.
4:05: Text messages begin. Russ is negotiating with a salesman! Who knew my husband had these types of skills. Russ successfully talks the sales guy down about $7000 on the price of the car. Amazing! However, he is texting and calling every 5 minutes with updates and Josie is getting pissed because I am not painting with her. Adam wakes up and needs to eat. Suddenly things are getting a little pear shaped.

5:00: The deal is done! But now I need to go to the dealership to sign papers. Russ comes to pick us up as I slap a sandwich together to feed Josie on the way. Adam is distraught and screaming. I am wearing pajama pants. The Johnsons get to the dealership like the stars of a bad sitcom.

6:00: We have been made to wait for an hour. Josie is so bored she could die. I am forced to nurse Adam in a small waiting area, which is more than a little embarrassing. Finally, we are called into the manager's office to sign paperwork.

6:15: Adam is beyond screaming. He is clearly being murdered. Josie is whining and wanting me to go look at other cars with her. I am trying to sign papers while bouncing Adam. The sleazy salesman continues to try to upsell us some warranty and I can barely hear him over Adam's screaming. I almost do a sweet roundhouse on this guy's a$$!

6:30: Josie: "I have to poop!" I am now carrying a screaming Adam around the dealership with Josie and looking for a restroom. We find one, but Josie is too scared to use it. I have to hold her on the potty with one hand, with Adam screaming in the other. When Josie is done, she says "my poop looks like a hot dog!" and wants to hang out in there discussing it.

7:00: Adam has finally calmed down and we are ready to get in our car and head home. Thank goodness! But the maintenance guys have to do a bunch of mumbo jumbo and we must wait another hour. I have lost any semblance of politeness and scream "I will cut you!" to anyone who attempts to delay us. (Well, at least with my eyes.)

8:00: HOORAY! We are finally done buying a car, for the love of God! We have our new super cool, brand new Mazda 5! All the Johnson's are too exhausted to do anything but go home and get into bed, but we have accomplished something fantastic! Not only can we afford this car, but it is awesome. And its over!!!

Who knew I could love a Mom-mobile so much? Our new car!

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Happy Birthday Josie!!

Today was Josie's 3rd birthday party!


Her birthday is not until Wednesday May 6, but we got lucky and celebrated today on one of the most beautiful days of the spring! Our friend Shamra, who has babysat for Josie for two years, came over to lead a "nature walk." Josie and two of her friends made binoculars, then walked from our house to the park to discover some nature! Josie tries out her new specs and hoped to find squirels and goats... we got one out of two, but I think she was pleased.


Here's Josie's friend Greta on the go!



Friend Franny finds a butterfly and is totally psyched!


Keeping in mind we are dealing with two- and three-year olds, I didn't know how much of an attention span they would have. And, as guessed, as soon as they saw the park they hit the equipment and the nature walk was history. But they all had a great time playing in the sun!




Time for birthday cake-- don't get excited, I definitely outsourced this! Its not as nice as something Kimmy would make, but Josie loved it!

Delicious!




On the way home, Franny and Josie remembered the whole "finding nature" thing again and stopped to check out a giant ant colony. Gross! But I guess, whatever the birthday girl wants she can get... at least for today.






Josie's friends went home and we opened presents after things quieted down. She got some fun new toys, but her favorite was her new Cowgirl costume! She hasn't taken it off all day and even wanted to sleep in it tonight. Playing dress-up is so gold!
All in all a successful birthday!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

All uphill from here

This past week has been even better. I am definitely hitting my stride in my new "two kid" world. Josie continues to adjust to Adam (and his crying spells) and I am even starting to find time to eat and shower. This is great!

In the meantime, here are a few photos of the brood from the past week.
Benjamin Button takes his first bath in a tub- no more sponge baths for this little guy! (And why is it that newborn boys all look like little old men?)




Thanks for covering up my parts, Mom!
Josie has been really into all things baby and she and her baby have been inseparable. On Saturday, Josie and I went to the park. I pushed Adam in his stroller, and Josie pushed her baby in her toy stroller. Josie is also fascinated by the baby bjorn, so when she discovered her baby's carrier could be worn like a baby bjorn, she was psyched!


Josie carrying her baby around everywhere she goes, just like Mommy and Adam!

Look what Russ does when I leave the room for one minute. I expect there will be many more pictures like this to come!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter everyone!

Today is a great day for the Johnson family because Josie is FINALLY recovered from her week-long flu (the worst flu she's ever had- great timing, kid!) that also infected Russ and me. And with fevers subsided, we actually pulled ourselves together enough to celebrate the holiday!


Yesterday Josie and I dyed eggs for the first time- no plastic eggs this year. Josie did a great job and only stained her shirt a little. :)

Before bed we set out her awesome eggs with some carrots and a little water for the Easter Bunny. Let the fun begin!

We knew we did not have it together enough to get all the family dressed and to Church, but Josie was too excited about wearing her Easter dress. So we got her all dressed up and let her dance around the house a bit. Then we went outside to look for eggs!


Hottie 2.0 gets in on some Easter fun by staying awake for more than 10 minutes. Way to go Adam!

Let the search begin!
Finding eggs....
Adam partakes in a little Easter Egg hunting. Too bad he's pretty much sleeping through it...
Searching for eggs is tiring....
The most hilarious egg- for some reason Josie was incapable of finding this last egg. Russ took a picture of her practically standing on it, yet still not seeing it!
Victory! All eggs are found and back in the house. Only a few casualties... every time Josie found one, she would spike it down into her basket in celebration. I don't think she really grasped the whole "real eggs are fragile" thing...
A successful first holiday as a family of four!

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Welcome Home Baby Adam!!!

Tomorrow is Adam's 3 week birthday, and I can't believe how fast these past few days have gone! Its far past time to post pictures of my little man, so here they are. Feast your eyes on this stud muffin!

He's just so cute and snuggly in his bouncy seat!



Wide awake and checking out his new home (and listening to his sister talking!) He always looks so serious!

Josie has been totally into her new baby brother! After a few days she has gotten used to the crying, and while she definitely is adjusting to having less attention, she doesn't take it out on Adam. She wants to kiss him and "help" me take care of him all the time!

A little male bonding time. Russ is so excited that he will not spend the rest of his life surrounded by females!

Tummy time!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Favorite Josie Quote of the Day

To set the stage: Mom and Josie were listening to music during dinner.

Josie: Who is singing this song?
Mom: Its a band called Interpol.
Josie: Hey!! Santa lives in Interpol!!!

Monday, March 9, 2009

Russ and I are the greatest parents ever- too bad Josie didn't notice

Well folks, I am pregnant and cranky. Real pregnant. And REAL cranky. And I think I am driving everyone near me crazy with my bad attitude (read: Russ). So on Sunday, Russ decided he needed to get me out of the house. So, after reading the crapload of "preparing your child for the new baby" materials we got from the hospital, we decided to do an all out "Big Sister Extravaganza" for Josie.

We decided we would first take Josie to Target and let her pick out a new toy- anything she wanted. This is something we have never done before. Then we planned to take her to a totally kid-friendly restaurant and fill her up with amazing kid food. Maybe she'd even get dessert. I mean, this is big time.

We got Josie up from her nap and gave her an amazing speech. "Josie, we are so proud of you for being such a big girl! You are such a good girl, and now you are even going to be a big sister!!!" We poured it on thick. We told her about getting a new toy at Target. Then we paused and waited for the excitement and adoration to flow. Then Josie noticed a book had fallen off her book shelf and went to go straighten it. Then she asked Russ if he would read her one of her old Highlights magazines. Hmm.

So we left for Target. Josie was not thinking about new toys, but demanding we play Elvis CD's during the drive. Then she was demanding we play the CORRECT Elvis CD's during the drive. And at the correct volume. Serenity now!

We get to Target. Josie is now totally psyched, as are we. We never spoil her like this, and buying her a non-Christmas or Birthday present seemed like an awesome adventure. She had the pick of the store and lots of time to choose. New Barbie??? Sweet Disney Princess action set??? Fairy Costume??? The options are endless!!! But for what does Josie make a beeline? The odd wall of 3-inch plastic animals. Under the section that sells creepy Dragons, Lords, and Gargoyles. She is now literally lying on the floor of target playing with a creepy plastic swan-thing and frickin' loving it. After an hour, we left Target with a baby tiger, baby coyote, kangaroo, and horse. Wow.

Now was the next phase of our extravaganza-- dinner. As many of you know, Russ and I are ardent vegetarians, and have been for nearly a decade. And we are raising Josie vegetarian as well. However, we are conscious of giving Josie a well-rounded childhood and recognize that- to our disgust- this must include Happy Meals. So that's right folks-- we took her to McDonald's.

We ordered Josie a Happy Meal and let the fun begin. She did totally love it. She went all out on the fries and even ate half a hamburger (yikes). Yet again she baffled us, as instead of loving the other kids and the crappy food, she seemed more into the fact that there was a baseball game on tv in the corner. ("Look Daddy, Baseball players!!!!!" Baffling!)

All was redeemed at the end of the dinner when Russ bought her a sweet vanilla twist cone. It was the size of her head, and took a lot of help from Daddy to eat it all, but it was probably the most exciting moment of Josie's life. And Josie's total love of the random plastic animals did warm our hearts a bit. So while Josie may not have grasped the "special-ness" of the night, and the occasion, at least it was a great night for us.

Josie eats the greatest ice cream cone ever! (Note her plastic animals on the table...)



Victory! Day is finally confirmed as the greatest- thanks to a little ice cream!